Noted Habits

If you attempted the “Habit Exercise” (Feb 13th blog), then for sure you have started your introspection on your habits.

The most tangible habits one can work on easily fall under the category of finances or health. Habits that fall under a definite material change are easier to work on. The emotional/mental issues behind habits that either subconsciously or unconsciously happen are not verily tangible. One needs to exert some thinking when one is altering an action, and it is far easier to work on material habits. Have you attempted to change something from the list of habits you have? That’s a start but not so fast.

The “Habit Exercise” is a quick way with a bit of help from a friend(s) to help create some motion towards reviewing your habits.

I am going to share one of my habits, which actually changed with my personal circumstances. Working on small financial pocket expense took me to a very different view of a habit. I consciously started off wanting to save some change (no pun intended). One needs to exert some thinking when one is altering an action. I remember spending a lot on coffee, daily before work. It is what we all do, right? We all queue up at a favourite coffee shop, rush off with our cup of java and then rush off to our business; and then, in many work offices there is coffee there as well. Coffee is better than gold!. (I think we should use coffee beans as currency? What do you say!? ). Unfortunately, I did not succeed with saving any money on my daily, and sometimes afternoon coffee breaks.

I remember changing my job where there was no coffee, so I started taking my own coffee to work and I even had hot chocolate some days, and tea which I used to prefer over coffee. I saved a lot, and I did not have multiple cups of coffee. So my work circumstance changed and I so did my spending on coffee change. I still love to sit with my morning coffee on weekends and think about my chores, and bills, and procrastinate. I am in control of this habit, I think! I love my procrastination habit at times. It’s not good from a societal point of view, not even a personal one, but there is no guilt there for me, because my best ideas and creativity happens while I am just sitting drinking my cup of java.

Habits can work for or against one. Habits are in the realm of tools of action and living; living healthy, productive and good lives. Some people are more disciplined and have taken an approach where their routines add structure to their living. It is important to never become obsessive in anything.

The worst of habits have been born out of stress, pain and grief which can lead to counter means of coping with circumstances.

Know that all habits can be made and can be broken. I mentioned in the “Habit Exercise” blog that no one will know your habits as you, nor will they know the deeper rooted causes. Others may be able to help you through their perception and observation of knowing you well. Keep in mind that habits don’t define who you are, even if the world sees your personality through your habits. No one completely knows you! You know you, and you know who and what you are. Change allows you to discover you!  So learning to become aware of your habits is important in adjusting your patterns of activity. The desire or need to change, or the desire for change, is the ultimate catalyst (your desired objective or goal). Change also happens out of unforeseen circumstances, which may not be associated with any desire, but born out of consequence. If that is the case, always know that you have choices even when the choices are few.

So let’s revisit the second last line of the Habit Exercise, Part II, number, 5:   Beside each habit on the ‘other’ list(s) check mark all the unconscious habits. Read the unconscious habits out loud. Ask yourself why you placed a mark to indicate a habit was unconscious (?) Methodically, go through each habit you check-marked and write a short paragraph stating your reasons why you think the habit is unconscious.

For instance, my morning coffee habit is a routine. I put the kettle on without too much thought. Why is it unconscious? When did I start this habit? Your memory will take you to a place you would not normally think about. My coffee habit started when I started studying; otherwise I was a tea person. Growing up (in my life experience), children did not drink coffee until they were adults. Coffee was what adults enjoyed. I had warm milk in the morning or a cup of hot coco - freshly grated coco bean powder in my milk. My family would be anxious to break their fast and sit beside each other and enjoy breakfast. It was family and that was comforting, and all the associated memories that went with breakfast, especially my cup of coco. Therefore, I unconsciously associate having my morning coffee with early breakfasts with my family. Of course, my unconscious reasoning may not be another’s but a lot of us in the world do love their coffee and tea to start their day off.

Once you have completed writing your paragraphs outlining what you believe to be your reasons for your unconscious habits, take a break for a week or two and revisit your notes and your paragraphs, and think about your habits. Take time to think about your reasoning and allow your memories to come through your thoughts. You just might start to see through all your habits in a very different way.